Wedding experience: The ideal and the reality.

Hope you find the proposal a fun process, cause the rest of these experiences are the tough ones.

After she said yes, its timely to let your parents know about this. Of course, you could let them know way before you want to propose but most of us guys would keep it quiet, in case of ... Well you know.

And yes, after your parents know about it, you should meet up with her folks and officially ask for permission. After all, her parents have brought her up and its their faith in you they would entrust her well being.

This comes to the another question. Should you arrange a meeting between 2 families? The answer is Yes, though there is no rush on this. After all, a meeting between 2 families would be more of just a visit. Several decisions have to be made and agreed upon.

Which is why I din arrange for a meeting straight away. Instead we both discuss on what we would like our weddings to be. From this we will also include what our families wishes are likely to be. Once we more or less aligned and compromised, its when a meeting would be arranged.

I must say, this aint an easy step. Your ideal wedding may be different from hers. She may not want Stormtrooper and Jedi knight, raising their guns and lightsaber as you march in. You may not want to be in a pink tux.

From experience, I learned that its always easier to discuss about your ideal weddings even before you propose. Both parties will get an idea on what each other ones and there will be little surprises.

Your families wishes comes next. After all, its your wedding and you should have the first say of things.

Your parents may not be keen on a western menu or the lack of sharkfin or one the "sister" is actually a dude. Some of their ideas might be traditional and if you are able to make do, do give in to them. This applies to certain strong belief they have. A wedding is also a marriage of 2 families and you wont want to start off on the wrong footing here.

The troublesome part might be that the 2 families have different views on how things are to be. Being the couple, you will find yourself in a tight spot here. I am lucky not to experience this. Our families are accommodating.

What I learned is that if shit does happen, dun get yourself trapped in between. Arrange for the parents to meet up for discussion. You just have to facilitate. Its likely both parties will find areas they can compromise in. After all, our parents wont want to let any matter disrupt the wedding.

Do remember, do not shaft small matters aside. This are like gremlims which tends to feed and grow. Address them timely and openly. You be surprise by this.